The question is: who came up with this "politically correct" use of the language crap? I do not like it!
Who thought that changing the names of things, or that trading a word for another one, just to PRETEND one does not mean what one really means, would make any difference? It does NOT!
I've said it before and I repeat: I am not politically correct. Life is already too complicated and my mom taught me to be honest. She said that HYPOCRISY is wrong.
Let me show you what I had to learn, since I came to live in the US:
- Don't ever say "Oh...my God!" as an exclamation of surprise.
I always thought that, by saying it, I was kind of meaning something like:
"Oh, my God, give me a hand here, please!", or "Oh, my God, this place is beautiful - thank you so much!".
Right? No offence intended, just my way of talking to Him.
But that's a no-no!
Instead, if you say "Oh... my Gosh!!" - meaning the same thing, it is OK.
Go figure.
You see, I don't know this guy Gosh and I do not want him helping me, as well as I have absolutely nothing to thank him for. If not that, tell me, who gave them the right to give God a nickname? Does that make sense?
- Don't say "Hell", when something really pisses you off.
Hell seems to not exist here in this side of the world. Yeah... right!
Instead say "Heck".
Hell has been demoted/promoted (?) to Heck. Please, I am from a tropical country. Even the weather may have similarities to hell over there. What's that all about?
- Don't say "Fucking thing", "Fucking good", "Fucking ugly", etc.
I thought that it only meant top notch something. I said it once to a co-worker. She had made a flower arrangement for a customer and it was so beautiful that I told her: You are fucking good, girl!! Oh, my.
Instead, say "Freaking thing", or "Freaking good".
Everybody knows you mean "Fucking" but, this way, it is politically correct. What?
- The same applies for "Fuck!", as an expression of surprise.
Didn't you know that "Fudge!!!" has the same meaning, use and intention but it is acceptable?
Fudge, fudge, fudge!!!!!
- Don't say "Old Person".
Say "Senior Citizen".
Well, I am an old person and I tell you, it took me a long time to get here. So, leave me alone with this nonsense.
- Don't say "Damned thing". Or, worse yet, "God Damn it"!
The world will stop! The boss will fire your little pretty ass so fast that you will not realize what hit you.
So I go to the net and search. It means "the concept of everlasting divine punishment" - go check for yourselves, if you do not believe me.
Now, if I am so freaking pissed with something, what's wrong with me asking Gosh (?) to come and "divinely punish it"?? I cannot do it myself, right? But, again, this is such a no-no that even when you think it, you better look around - twice - in this country.
Instead say "Dang thing".
Ding... dang... dong... ding... dang... dong...
That's how my head is going right now. What to do?
- Don't say "Fat person". Oh, no!! It may bring tears to some people, as I saw happen to another co-worker. And I was not even talking about her.
A fat person in this society will accept being called "heavy".
It seems that "heavy" makes the person lighter than fat. Better yet, if you say "a little heavy".
That's what I call denial people.
Being fat is not different from being tall, short, blond, brunette, old, young... or whatever. It is just what it is. And what is wrong with that? Am I not seeing it?
The list is almost endless.
What disturbs me is the fact that all these replacement words have the same meaning.
The-Same-Meaning!!
Is it, or is it not hypocritical??
I've been trying to learn this language the best that I can but, this constant change of words is complicating my life.
I am lost!
Note: a lot of sarcasm was used in this post. I am aware that certain language can be offensive to different societies and I struggle to adapt my nasty behaviour, and be an honest part of the one (society) that so graciously accepted me in its home.
4 comments:
Funny you bring this up (where are you from originally, anyway?) -- we were watching an Australian comedian on HBO last night and he continually used words that were likely offensive to most people, but he didn't understand that.
Different cultures, different attitudes. My husband is a union iron worker -- so I've heard it all. Doesn't bother me in the least. I've become immune. :)
Having been raised in a house where you didn't swear in front of the kids (but could scream it in the hall), I know all the words, and use them on occasion, myself. The only time I am really offended is if I am watching a movie and every other word is the F word, then I will get rid of it.
Yes, there is that "double talk" here, it's what we grew up with, that's all.
Oh My God! I'm Fat....what the hell! Say what you want....you make me laugh!!!!
P.S. Here is the site that I make the photo mosaics on....
http://bighugelabs.com/mosaic.php
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Miriam, I completely LOVE this post! You are consistently hilarious. You are making me healthier just reading your words. Thank you!
Having been raised in a relatively typical USA home by dearly beloved Christian parents, we could not even say such things as "fart" and "sex" and "butt" (certainly not ass) - had to refer to certain anatomical regions as "privates" - and on and on and on.
Like you, I find this practice highly hypocritical. I do not hold it against my folks for striving to bring us up with manners and decorum, but the silliness of our substitutions is sometimes straight up annoying. Let me just say the actual effin words already!!
Sorry to make such a long comment, but I just have to mention - my dad was totally funny. He used substitutions like "dagnabbit" "blasted" "fibbledsnickets" - I mean, he invented TONS of wonderful gibberish expressions to avoid saying what I KNOW was in his mind.
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