Life is good again

So, they did not throw me out of the Country.

When I came to the US, both Gordon and I thought that our wedding was enough to assure that I would be accepted as a foreigner living in the country.

Just like that.

WRONG!

One day, while my tourist visa was still valid, I phoned the Brazilian Consulate. I wanted to know something related to Gordon's entrance back in Brazil, because we were planning to go back to visit my mom. The lady on the phone (a Brazilian) provided me with the information I wanted and, for some Godly chance, she asked me if I had applied for my "Green Card"  already.

And I went on saying that I was married to this naughty American blue eyed boy, therefore, I was all proud that everything was fine.

Was it?

- No, my friend! You have until your Tourist visa expires to stay in the country. After that, married or not, they can kick your nasty Brazilian butt out so fast that you will not know what hit you!

To my then horrified, panicked questions, she told me what to do. Where to start it. 

You see, we had already gone through the procedure of getting my Social Security number, at a local Government Office. And nobody asked something like:

- Why is this forty five years old woman only now applying for this document?

To which we would have replied "Because she is not American". To which, one would imagine they would have questioned "So, where is her Green Card?". To which we would have inquired enough to understand the whole process that was necessary.

Nope.

No questions asked therefore, no information available either.

If if wasn't for that Brazilian lady at the Consulate, I don't know.

So, we started the "Green Card" process, back then. We contacted whoever we needed to, and were told to contact someone else, again, and again. I cannot tell the whole story because it was a nightmare!

"A wild goose chase just to get the information that we needed" as Gordon puts it.

When, finally, the papers that were supposed to be filled came through mail, it was a PACKAGE. A huge package!

I remember that, as we opened it, I started crying. I could not believe that we had to fill in all those papers, and, for each set, we had to pay!!

At the end of that process, we had paid over three thousand dollars!!

I cannot tell you how many times I had to answer to the question: "Have you ever been arrested?" 

Dang! Arrested? Heck, no!! No freaking body in my whole freaking family (not even my witch grandma) has ever been freaking arrested!! Being arrested in my country is not "tater tots" like it may be here.

I had to go through a medical exam. Had my blood taken. (I bet my DNA is filed somewhere, just in case.)

I had to answer questions such as: " Do you have Aids?" " Do you suffer from tuberculosis?" "Do you have any kind of STD?" At this point, I had to laugh, as the image of an  "old, retired and diseased whore" came to my mind.

My dad and mom would have had a fit, if they had heard those questions.

And I finally got my "Green Card" . White, as I already told you. Valid for ten years. That was the first one, the one that will expire at the end of this year. That's why we had to go back, and request a renewal.

Four hundred and fifty dollars was the "fee" we just had to pay. Plus the hotel, plus the gasoline for the trip, plus the meals - I would guess something like $600 bucks for twelve minutes at the INS Office! And a new card that must come through mail.

Hopefully.

Now, I must clarify that I do love this country with all my heart. And that I do not want to go anywhere else.

For this reason, I will study until my brains melt, and will apply for Citizenship, in the future.

How about that?